Becoming Mentor-Minded

In our exploration of Pillar II – Puts People First – we will continue our dive into three core competencies as outlined by Sipe and Frick (2009):

1. Displays a Servant’s Heart

2. Is Mentor-Minded

3. Shows Care & Concern

Let’s look at the second one, Is Mentor-Minded. Sipe & Frick (2009) discuss becoming mentor-minded as an important component of putting people first. Have you had an experience where you were mentored by someone? Was it what you expected – better or worse? What specifically about the experience influenced your overall feel of the result?

Greenleaf often wrote about helping others grow as persons and this is at the heart of mentoring. How can we help others grow? Too often it is an ego trip – a mere chance for us to share our knowledge or impart our wisdom. We see it as a means to leave a legacy by creating a “little me.” But how does that truly help the mentee grow to be the best THEY can be?

This takes us to the first perspective question … is your mentoring (or desire to mentor) about YOU or the person you are mentoring? If it is about you, unfortunately, you are not really mentor-minded at this time – but you certainly can become mentor-minded!

OK, here is another check on your perspective … does being a mentor give you an ego boost because you can demonstrate your expertise? Again, if you are a servant leader and truly mentor-minded, the focus should be on helping the other person grow versus seeing what you can get from the experience.

In The Mentor’s Guide: Facilitating Effective Learning Relationships, Lois Zachary discusses the four stages of the mentoring cycle:

1. Preparing – both the mentor and the mentee engage in self-reflection to determine what she is expecting from the relationship.

2. Negotiating – this is the phase when agreements are established. Agree upon goals, processes, and ground rules.

3. Enabling – implementation or work phase of the partnership. This is the longest phase.

4. Coming to closure – entails consolidating the learning, evaluating the partnership, and celebrating successes.

As you can see from this list, it is focused on the mentee and what they want to learn – how they want to learn – relationships – partnership – growth! Never is there a mention about what the mentor gets from this or how the mentor uses their expertise to mold the mentee. It is a mutual experience but one that is focused on the mentee’s overall growth. Being mentor-minded requires listening and facilitated learning more that talking, ego, and teaching.

So you must ask yourself – am I ready to allow others to find their way toward their goals even if they are different from my goals or how I envision reaching them? If yes, then you are probably ready to be a servant leader mentor. If not, you may not be ready today but maybe you will be ready in the near future. Let’s see where this journey of servant leadership might take you!



References:

Sipe, J. W. & Frick, D. M. (2009). Seven Pillars of Servant Leadership: Practicing the Wisdom of Leading by Serving


Zachary, L.J. (2000). The Mentor's Guide: Facilitating Effective Learning Relationships

Displaying a Servant’s Heart

In our exploration of Pillar II – Puts People First – we will dive into three core competencies as outlined by Sipe and Frick (2009):

1. Displays a Servant’s Heart

2. Is Mentor-Minded

3. Shows Care & Concern

Let’s start with the first one, Displays a Servant’s Heart. We often hear this mentioned – but what does it mean and how can we display a servant’s heart. I think it starts with a true love of what we are doing – it needs to mean something to you in order to even engage your heart.

What does it take for something to be meaningful? Certainly a lot more than a paycheck or position or title. For most of us it equates to doing “good” either for society or for someone in particular. What is important to you? This goes back to what we have discussed before in our values conversation. What do you value? What is at the core of who you are as a person?

Once you understand your values it is also important to determine how that correlates with your service opportunities. For example, if you value the contributions of our elders, perhaps visiting nursing homes would be meaningful to you. If you value seeing women succeed, perhaps serving as a mentor or coach would be meaningful to you. Also think about how you have gotten to where you are today. Did someone help you? Was there an organization that you loved being a part of? Were there sports or other physical activities (i.e., music and arts) that helped you to express yourself? Now, consider what in particular was meaningful to you about those various experiences … you have probably just mapped out some ideas for how you might give back! Why not serve in a similar organization and help the next generation of leaders achieve what you have?

Sometimes it is a very simple gesture that displays your servant’s heart. Other times, it may be a major project or volunteer position that you agree to take on for an extended period of time. You may find that a combination of gestures, single events or encounters, long-term commitment may be the perfect approach for you. What most people find is that the more regularly they give of themselves, the more natural it becomes WHO they are versus an activity to add to their resume. That is when you truly have developed a servant’s heart and are able to share it with others.

Here is your challenge: What will do you in the next 5 days to cultivate your servant’s heart?


Reference:

Sipe, J. W. &  Frick, D. M. (2009).  Seven Pillars of Servant Leadership: Practicing the Wisdom of Leading by Serving